ALBATROSS sits at the very top, set so small you have to walk closer to read it. Which is correct. Nobody has ever needed a large albatross.
The Score Ladder takes the whole scoring vocabulary and sets it as one column of serif type, sized by how often each word actually happens to you. EAGLE stays modest. BIRDIE earns a single thin gold rule, because it has earned something. PAR sits calm and centred, the way par always does. Then BOGEY swells, DOUBLE swells further, and at the base — running the full width of the sheet, finished with a golf ball standing in for the full stop — OTHER.
There is no illustration, no club, no silhouette against a sunset. The type hierarchy does all the work, and the joke lands as affection rather than mockery: this is a scorecard drawn by somebody who still loves the game after forty years of it. Warm ivory ground, black ink, one line of gold. Printed on heavyweight luster photo paper so the serifs stay crisp at the small end and solid at the large, and framed in slim black ayous wood behind an acrylite front.
The details
- Paper: premium luster photo paper, 260 g/m², 10 mil (0.25 mm) thick — heavy enough to hold fine serif detail without ghosting.
- Frame: 0.75 in (1.9 cm) ayous wood frame in black, with an acrylite front protector in place of glass.
- Size and orientation: the 16 × 20 in size hangs landscape — 20 in wide by 16 in tall. The square artwork panel sits centred with an even white border on all sides.
- Ready to hang: hanging hardware is fitted before it ships — nothing to buy, nothing to assemble.
- Made to order in the United States and printed for you, one at a time.
Quick answers
What does the print actually say?
Seven words, top to bottom: ALBATROSS, EAGLE, BIRDIE, PAR, BOGEY, DOUBLE, OTHER. Each is set larger than the one above it, so the rarest score is the smallest line and OTHER fills the base of the sheet. A thin gold rule sits under BIRDIE, and a small golf ball serves as the final full stop.
Is this a good retirement gift for a golfer?
It is built for exactly that. It flatters nobody and forgives everybody, which is the tone most retiring golfers actually want — and it looks like a design piece on the wall rather than a novelty gag, so it survives past the first week.
Does it arrive framed and ready to hang?
Yes. It ships in a black 0.75 in (1.9 cm) ayous wood frame with an acrylite front protector and hanging hardware already fitted.
Which way round does it hang, and where does it suit?
It hangs landscape — 20 in wide by 16 in tall — so allow for a wide space rather than a tall one. The ivory ground keeps it quiet enough for a study, hallway or home office, and loud enough for a garage bar, golf room or society clubhouse.
A lifetime of scorecards, honestly summarised.
